Doreen Connors, 5
Interview with Doreen Connors
The reason I ask about this is because I have noticed for myself that though I have no way to measure my own awareness or my influence, I often find myself presented with an interesting choice in social situations (due to a natural attraction to light) to either keep the light well hidden out of “the idea of” patience and compassion (instead of letting the fireworks ensue– which due to my inherent nature can seem... again it is hard to measure... pretty transforming). I believe I err on the side of subduing now which was not always the case– part of which stemmed from both fascination with a new toy and ego. Is this something you deal with?
Immediately what came up for me is that due to physical limitation, I rarely go anywhere! LOL! I literally lost most of my old friends, though... gained many, recently around the world via ETTV. I feel like I went through exactly what You are talking about. Kinda... out of respect for all the "egos"... and now, I don't feel like I mute myself (although the patience and compassion... is more fully integrated…whatever that means... I am much more relaxed, at shining light in the house, here...
As this transition felt clear to me... I felt for a time, that my husband was more deeply affected by my presence... (maybe 2 months, now... and then, relatively recently his pain body came up... and it kinda surprised me! Well, now, I know...a complete "miracle" had not actually, occurred... lol! I more quickly, re-light... I truly know that if the least bit of "effort" (what the hell is that, anyway?) or feelings of struggle enter in... I take my foot off the brake!! It just feels, strange, to be... physically, here...not meeting other folks in the flesh! Rarely...besides my kids, their friends, and my husband.
Is it fair for me to ask about your physical limitation? I don't believe you have spoken of it. After that I have one more question and then I feel like this is a good natural spot to conclude. My last question is about whether there has been any presence with you through all of this that has not been mentioned like a pet, a stone, an herb, a being of some sort that has helped issue you through this transforming process to date.
Knee arthritis since 2007 that has progressed though I don't "mind... I currently do not go to doctors because I can't pay for it. Things that make sense to do, do not occur... It is a rather peculiar situation.
At the end of 2004, after having an intense lucid dream, I went to see a woman who did energy work/channeling... a truly wonderful being... I worked with her for a couple years (met her through the friend that told about her meditation method.)
This energy worker helped me to understand, on a very "high" level what was happening... the beauty... of our work together... is deep, indeed. I have tapes from our channeled sessions...that I have not listened to for quite some time. And then I had my friend in Sweden... it was through our connection that most of my awakening unfolded. I garnered enormous insights through our conversation... this is really important... the synchronicity that happened between us... it is complex and important.
So I lost touch with [my energy worker] for the past two years... don't know what she is doing... she was about, maybe 10 years "ahead of me?” Though...not sure about that. The nature in my backyard became crucial... especially the birds and our bunny rabbit, Big Dawg... and the insects, especially the dragonflies... and my kids, Maia now 18 and Owen nearly 14. They "know"... they are my teachers, too.
Well, I could also include, Bashar…he is a "channeled being" (have You heard of him... years ago I had fun with some friends listening to him (Darryl Anka)...in the mid-eighties)...I dropped this for several years... though, knew that this energy was always available...somehow....but "he" I was not that conscious of during this time...although, saw him in 2006. I'm probably missing something, perhaps??
Thank you for both allowing me to interview you on this, being so open during the process, and shining light.